Dowry - Inputs Needed on Root Causes

Only old mindset people indulge in giving / taking dowry. It is prevalent where the girl is not educated or not independent. Another reason for dowry is more girls as compared to boys. Now the trend has changed. There is adverse sex ratio in the country & girls are more & more educated. With this dowry has almost finished now. To eradicate further we must give education to our daughters & make them independent and self sufficient. Do not kill the girl child so that the sex ration become balanced more  

Parents can afford giving one time gifts to their daughter’s marriage How ever greedy in laws who oppose dowry at the time of marriage and prefer to marry their son where there are only daughters with sole aim to grab their property. I would like to bring the plight of the parents at old age specially having girl child only. Parents gave their life to bring and brought their girl child ,give best possible education, protect them from bad social elements, make her fit in all respect and marry her to lead a prosperous and happy life with her husband I would like to mention here that where the daughters after marriage are economically self dependent, help their parents financially, morally and very caring, such parents are lucky to live a peaceful and long life However situation is different where after marriage greedy husband and in laws first harass for dowry and then not allows them to join any career/profession of their study and interest to become economically independent, only for one reason that they had married for an eye on the property of their in laws. In such situations most of senior citizens having girl child faces mentally harassment, financial hardship and lack of care and dies at early age with out telling their untold stories to anyone due to obvious reasons and for their self respect except praying God as daughters are helpless being an unemployed and threat fear of divorce thus unable to help and care their parents due to economically dependent on their husbands and in laws In such cases husbands are also not caring for their career. In view of the problem faced by such parents having only girl child, my suggestions are that:- Harsh punishment to be given to husband and in laws for mentally harassing, pressing for dowry and threatening to divorce even through telephonically calls to their wives and old parents. 50% pay and property of their husband and in laws should be entitled to the wife in case forced to divorce, If proved that husbands and in laws not allowed their wives to join job as per qualifications and career prospects, Wives should be entitled 75% shares of her husband and in laws pay/pension/business/property. more  

[ A ] Those Caring neighbors and Society will reveal & Suggest in a particular way [ B ] Those Caring law & Activism , aggressive responsing , will opine & suggest differently [ C ] Commentators will opine in a different way [D ] Those Responsible & Administrative strategists will define and argue in a separate way. [ E ] Politicians caring only aggressors will take different view BUT, SOCIAL PERSONALITIES ONLY WILL BRING-UP THE FACTS FOR A PROPER, PERFECT AND FIT DECISION FOR ANY AND IN ANY . The following will reveal the Facts with proofs of the issue that establish the real truth . 1. The Dowry payment/awarding for new Family needs OR Property through Pasupukumkuma Gifts OR Kanyasulka system had been in practice and NONE YET FOUND THE YEAR FROM WHICH IT WAS STARTED. The complete details with all descriptions of the whole country through Rau’s committee Report were submitted to Parliament and the legislature started opting Chapter-wise since 1948 . This if read and understood , there will be the deemed fit application and provisions that are needed for a constitutional control in the light of the Composite culture persisted as on 1947 and later in India. The Reality hidden in Dowry System is only the Countable amount of Money needed to meet the expenditure incidental in the marriage System / Process & Procedure ; the list of items [ Family infrastructure ] that are needed to put-up a new Family by the Couple Independently AND NOTHING ELSE . This Expenditure if met with there will be considerable decrease and the T.T.D. have so started a Holy program of conducting multi-number of marriages at single time & place spending themselves at-least the requisite cost but only with those propose and indent. Country nor a Society can abolish a Traditional performance System and particularly the Marriage and its inevitably connected Blessings of a good number of participants for a purposed Good and Joint-life-lead to which some Holy and Social support is in-deed needed for the Peace and hidden Marital & Social life-lead which is an aught even if we consider the natural quality of Human-beings i.e., Man is a Social….living being ; Man cannot live alone even if he is 100% Self oriented ; loneliness develops anti-Social. 2. Even contractual marriage by a written Registration on oath simply garlanding each other also leads disasters and Divorce since it depends upon the Couple OR THAT JOINT MAN AND WOMAN. In a world’s largest & powerful Country, there were numerous Shootings/ killings ; Divorces up-to the decade 1980 – 1990 that was changed from that decade and the Patriots of that Country well know the Facts that lead to such a Peace in Joint life ; or ; let us say , a Married life. 3. The 2005 Succession and Inheritance Central Act amendment pertaining to Women’s Rights over the Joint Properties has given way for the raise of Human natural Ambition and desire over the benefits of the Married Lady’s Shared paternal Property at the acutely needed circumstances and this is only the cause for un-pleasantness, disgusts, disputes, and at some places of Ego, destructions too. There is absolute need to alter the said 2005 Central Amendment Act deleting the added coverage to REALLY HONOUR AND ACT ON THE ARREST OF DOWRY. THIS REALLY REMOVES THE PRESENT SITUATION OF MARITAL LIFE DISPUTES/DESAUSTERS IN ALL THE TYPES OF ISSUES FROM THE YEAR 2005 THAT ARE STAGED AS RELATED TO DOWRY. THE DEMAND OF SOME PROPERTY BEFORE MARRIAGE OF EVEN A POLICE OFFICER’S DAUGHTER REPORTED TO POLICE BY THAT LADY AT VISAKHAPATNAM THROUGH T.V. IS THE STRICT PROOF OF THIS CREATED MENACE. 4. If Statistically analyzed, the inherent awareness of Humanity, Mankind, Generosity and, Social nature has maximum reduced the Dowry Episodes - PRIOR TO THE YEAR 2000 - except where the Egos, Ambitions, desires, Superiority/Inferiority complexions instigated through un-worthy and un-toward Arguments within the married Couple during the recent past and the Changes in life-lead patterns at the out-set of modernized attitude of imbibed Civilization. 5. Financial implications vested in the above causes specified under root cause 1 & 3 if addressed by the Governments by them selves , there will be again a re-start of reducing and or controlling Dowry issues WHOLLY and even in those under the modernized life-styles tendering much & more money. 6. In this connection, since the issues of ;; Property succession ;; Family as earlier defined ;; Indian Marital Life ;; Dowry ;; Divorce ;; Maintenance ;; are inter-linked , there is absolute necessity to re regard the Supreme Court advises and comments in some cases under Section 498 a . 7. However, the main root cause is only the non-enforcing the I. P. C. as in the other issues . If IPC has been strictly implemented , there will not the raise of not only this , any such issues for a public discussion. more  

सोन्याची कांब ! (स्वच्छ भारत, जलयुक्त शिवार, शौचालये, वृक्षारोपण, मुलगी वाचवा-मुलगी वाढवा...संदेश देणारे रुपक) एका आजोबांना रानावणांत एकट्याने भटकायला खूप आवडायचं. हरणांचे कळप, रंगीबेरंगी पक्षांचे थवे, ओढे, नदीनाले, वार्‍यावर लयबद्ध डोलणारी वक्षवल्लरी पहात पहात लहानाचे मोठे झालेले आजोबा हल्ली मात्र उदास उदास असतात. उघडेबोडके डोंगर, कोरडेठाक विहीरी-निर्झर, सैरभैर झालेले वन्यजीव. एकदा असंच हिंडत असताना त्यांना कोल्ह्याच्या पिल्लाच्या पायात पतंगाचा धारदार मांजा अडकून ते वेदनेनं विव्हळत असताना दिसलं. आजोबा हळुवारपणे मांजा सोडवून पिल्लाला मोकळं करतात. पिल्लू थोडावेळ दयाद्र नजरेने आजोबाकडे पहातं आणि आनंदाने उड्या मारत निघून जातं. ते नजरेच्या टप्प्यापलिकडे जाईपर्यंत आजोबा त्याच्याकडे एकटक बघतच राहातात. दुसर्‍या दिवशी आजोबा नेहमीप्रमाणे पुन्हा भ्रमंतीवर जातात तर त्यांना तेच पिल्लू त्यांच्या वाटेत आडवं येतं, लाडेलाडे पायात घोटाळतं. पिल्लू आजोबांना त्याच्या आईकडे घेऊन जातं. कोल्ही म्हणते, "आजोबा, पाणवठे कमी झाले. जंगलांवर तुम्ही लोकांनी अतिक्रमणं केली. आमचं जगनं मुश्किल झालं आहे. असो. काल आपण माझ्या लेकराचा जीव वाचवलात. तुम्हाला देण्यासाठी माझ्याकडं फळफळावळंही नाहीत. हा घ्या रुमाल. या रुमालाची विशेषता अशी की तो जो कोणी डोक्यावर बांधील त्याला पक्षांचा संवाद ऐकू येईल आणि समजेलही." आजोबा नाखुषीनेच रुमाल स्वीकारतात. त्यातूनच पुढे पक्षांचे काही संवाद ऐकून आजोबा एका सावकाराच्या मुलीचे प्राण वाचवतात. खूष होऊन सावकार आजोबांना सोन्याची एक जाडजूड कांब भेट देतात. आजोबा ती कांब घेऊन कोल्हीकडे जातात. कोल्ही त्यांचे हसतमुखाने स्वागत करते. आजोबा तिला म्हणतात, "तू दिलेल्या रुमालामुळे ही कांब मिळाली आहे. तिच्यावर तुझाच अधिकार आहे. ही घे कांब." कोल्ही म्हणते, "ठेवा तुमच्याकडेच. सोन्याचा आम्हाला काय उपयोग ?" आजोबांनाही सोन्याचा लोभ नसतो. आता या सोन्याचं काय करावं, या विचाराने आजोबा बैचेन होतात. रुमालाविषयी, सोन्याच्या कांबीविषयी आजोबांनी कुणालाही सांगितलेले नसते. एके दिवशी निवांत क्षणी ते त्यांच्या अर्धांगिणीला म्हणतात, "अहो, माझ्याकडे एक सोन्याची कांब आहे जी माझी नाही आणि तिच्यावर जिचा हक्क आहे, तिला तिचा काही उपयोग नाही. आता मी काय करु ?" धर्मपत्नी म्हणते, "आजपर्यंत स्वार्थ कधी तुमच्या मनाला शिवला नाही. तुम्ही योग्य तेच कराल, याची मला खात्री आहे." आजोबा त्यांच्या मुलांकडे विषय काढतात. थोरला म्हणतो, "बाबा, तुमच्या आशिर्वादानं आपण सारे खाऊन पिऊन सुखी समाधानी आहोत. काय करायचं ते माय आणि तुम्ही दोघं ठरवा." धाकटाही दुजोरा देतो परंतु त्याची बायको मात्र कुरकुरते. सरपंच म्हणतात, "आजोबा, आपण गावात महाविद्यालय काढू, त्याला तुमचे नाव देऊ. माझ्या जावायाला प्राचार्यपदी नेमू, गावाचं भलं होईल." अनेकांचे अनेक प्रस्ताव येतात. धर्मशाळा, मठ, मंदीर, चावडी,... चर्चा तलाठ्याच्या कानावर जाते. तो पोलिसपाटलासह आजोबांकडे येतो. "हे पहा आजोबा, तुमच्याकडे सोन्याची कांब कुठून आली, याची आम्हाला चौकशी करावी लागेल. त्याचा अहवाल वरती पाठवावा लागेल. तुमच्यासारख्या प्रतिष्ठित व्यक्तीची बदनामी होऊ शकते. प्रकरण इथेच मिटवून टाकू. विचार करा. येतो आम्ही." त्या दोघांची तोंडं सावकार बंद करतात. आजोबा गावच्या शाळेत जातात. सर्व शिक्षक, विद्यार्थ्यांसमोर कांबीची सविस्तर माहिती प्रथमच कथन करतात. त्यांचे विचार जाणून घेतात. एका चुणचुणीत विद्यार्थीनीकडून आलेला प्रस्ताव त्यांना खूप आवडतो. तो ग्रामसभेपुढे मांडला जातो. प्रस्ताव देणार्‍या मुलीचे सारा गाव कौतूक करतो आणि झपाटल्यागत कामाला लागतो. डोंगरं, गायरानं, रस्त्यांच्या दुतर्फा, मंदीरं, शाळा, हागनदारी सगळीकडे वृक्षारोपण केले जाते. ओढ्यांची खोली व रुंदी वाढवून जागोजाग बांध घातले जातात. पाणवठे निर्माण केले जातात. जलयुक्त शिवार कार्यक्रम हाती घेतले जातात. घरोघरी शौचालये बांधली जातात. कचरा, सांडपाणी व्यवस्थापन मार्गी लागते. दारु भट्ट्या उध्वस्त केल्या जातात. सारा गाव सौरदिव्यांनी उजळून निघतो. गावाच्या मदतीला निसर्गही धाऊन येतो. पाच वर्षांच्या अथक सांघिक प्रयत्नातून गावाला "आदर्शग्राम", शिवाराला "आदर्शशिवार" आणि ग्रामस्थांना "आदर्श माणसं" पुरस्कार जाहीर होतात. लोकवर्गणी आणि सामुदायिक श्रमातून ही सारी किमया घडते. कांब मोडायची वेळंच येत नाही. पुरस्कार वितरण सोहळ्यात आजोबा रहस्योदघाटन करतात, " बंधू-भगिणींनो, माझ्याकडच्या ज्या सोन्याच्या कांबीने गावाचा कायापालट घडवून आणला असे आपण समजत आहात, तशी कांब किंवा जादुई रुमाल माझ्याकडे कधीच नव्हता. तुमच्यातलं स्वत्व जागृत व्हावं म्हणून मला थाप मारावी लागली. या कामी सावकाराने मला मदत केली. आम्हाला क्षमा करा. सार्‍या गावाला प्रेरणा आणि दिशा देणारी आपल्या गावची ही मुलगीच खरी सोन्याची कांब आहे. घरोघरी अशा सोन्याच्या कांबी जन्माला याव्यात, हीच माझी इच्छा आहे. धन्यवाद." *सोमनाथ देविदास देशमाने,शोभा हाऊसिंग कॉलनी, शिंदे मळा,सावेडी, अहमदनगर-४१४००३भ्रमणध्वनी: ९४२१६३६२९१; ९७६३६२१८५६.* more  

There are other aspectswhich being missed completely: 1. Low education of would be brides, and, hence, they are not being seen as earners for the family. 2.Most families are not willing to share their property with female child, though required by law. 3. Traditionally, families and grooms are seeking brides of younger age ? Why, when average age of females is more than that of males world over including India.? more